The Most Interesting Girl in the World

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I don’t always eat McDonald’s, but when I do, it’s from September through March. When they have a sweet promotion. Or when I’m hungover.

No, for serious, I am a marketing professional’s wet dream. McDonald’s-which I typically hold great disdain for, most of the time-sucks me in for the better half of the end of September through the middle of March. First, they drag my obsessive love-of-the-game/love-of-the-hunt person in for McDonald’s Monopoly. I find this to be much more successful that Subway’s failure-esque Scrabble (regardless of my passion for letters, words, and particularly, Scrabble).

Check out this old-school Monopoly commercial. Don’t you want a Sears Shopping Spree??

Then, when the joy of Monopoly has ceded, McDonald’s brings back that annual November treat known as the McRib. Don’t judge my McRib love. I realize that it’s a disgusting glob of random pork-like meat covered in BBQ sauce, but shoooot…. get that thing without pickles and you’ve got a meal fit for a grade school cafeteria queen.

Of course, McDonald’s never ceases to amaze me, and while I used to disappear from their radar from December through March, they’ve changed things up on me. After Monopoly, Cletus and I will have to WAIT until Christmas for our tasty meat candy. The McRib will be debuted around the holidays to promote sales.

Then comes that beautifully green and minty Shamrock Shake to bring McD’s back into my good graces. Of course, I swear it tasted better before they changed their shake recipe…but who am I to judge? It’s freakin’ McDonald’s. It’s also important to note, that ordering the SS without whipped cream or the cherry makes it inherently better.

So, you may be asking, why is this important? Obviously, it’s not…but McDonald’s started the Monopoly game bright and early this morning, and let’s just say I wasn’t last in line… For those of you who are curious, 24-hour McDonald’s restaurants begins serving breakfast between 3 and 4 AM.

The most interesting girl in the world
I don’t always eat McDonald’s, but when I do…it’s for breakfast.

Side note: That sugary looking coffee drink. NOT. WORTH. IT. It tasted like overly sweetened whole chocolate milk with a smidge of coffee goodness. I threw it away and got a real coffee. (After I peeled the Monopoly pieces off).

As an old pro (and the winner of a $50 Shell gift card and essentially, a lifetime supply of free shipping on Snapfish prints), I know the ins and outs of this game.

First, Know Your Prize Foods

Don’t worry, I already did the work for you:

4 Peels-Large Fries
4 Peels-20 Piece Chicken McNuggets
2 Peels-10 Piece Chicken McNuggets
2 Peels-Filet O Fish
2 Peels-Big Mac
2 Peels-Medium McCafe Iced & Blended Drinks
2 Peels-Large McCafe Iced & Blended Drinks
2 Peels-Large Iced Coffee
2 Peels-Medium Drink
2 Peels-Oatmeal
2 Peels-Egg McMuffin or Sausage McMuffin with Egg
2 Peels-Hashbrowns
 

Second, Cheat the System

I had attempted to cheat the system by ordering the iced coffee with no ice. Big mistake. Huge. (Name that movie) The woman didn’t speak a whole lot of English and had no idea what she was doing… She also messed up my

Ordering medium drinks (preferably something you already drink) regularly ensures that you’re not stuffing your face 3-4 times a day with McDonald’s food. Plus it’s just like a dollar or something for the instant gratification of additional game pieces.

Third, Play Online

Use those game codes and get your butt to the McDonald’s Monopoly website and sign up. Enter those codes to get additional prizes. This is where I’ve been named a winner. Just do it. And if you don’t want to do it, mail those damn things to me. The more the merrier. 🙂

If you do play online, enter the code super early in the morning (on a Sunday)…This boosts your chances of winning.

Fourth, Send Away for Free Pieces

For the cost of 2 stamps, you can get multiple game pieces. It’s been a few years since I sent away, but I think that it was 2 game pieces or 4 peels from each self-addressed stamped envelope. The only pain in the ass with this is SASE inside of a hand-writted addressed envelope to McDonald’s.

2012 MONOPOLY Game at McDonald’s Game Piece Request
P.O. Box 49121
Strongsville, OH 44149-0121
 

Fifth, If You’re REALLY Feeling Crazy…

You can opt to wander around the exterior of the local McDonald’s parking lot to locate rogue (err discarded) game pieces. When I was in college, I did this with some embarrassing regularity. Now that I’m a grown up, I don’t do this…much.

You can also pitch a fit about there being no-purchase-necessary when you order off the dollar menu, and if you get a really great/annoyed employee, they’ll just throw a few empty cups at you with a disgruntled look. Not that I’ve done that or anything…

So there you have it, folks, my obsession with McDonald’s Monopoly. And of course, with all of my favorite bits of crazy, I’ve taken the liberty of participating in yet another photo shoot. You’re welcome.

The actual odds: 1 in 6.
The odds that they tell you…
BC=Before Coffee
AD=After Drinking (coffee)

Last but not least, I’d like to thank the wonderful crew at McDonalds for spending hours making those Egg McMuffins, without which I might never be tardy.

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6 Responses

  1. I’m with wordsforwisdom… 2 awesomely awesome movie quotes in one post? Lovely.

    2nd – I don’t know if you’re going to get your McRib’s this year… I heard on the news this morning there’s going to be a global swine shortage by Thanksgiving due to the drought. Read: Start stock-piling bacon in your freezer now when you see it on sale.

    You can thank me later. 😛

  2. That coffee drink looked so good too. I can’t believe you know this much about McD’s Monopoly. It’s kind of amazing. I’m surprised they haven’t put you in a commercial yet because THEY TOTALLY SHOULD!

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