I thought I’d talk to you guys about sneaking out. Or in. Or doing some type of “sneaking.” Me? I don’t think I’ve ever snuck out. I was a good kid. My mama raised me right. (If you didn’t read that one, I highly recommend it.) I didn’t drink or do drugs. I didn’t do too many crazy things. I mean, I was a teenager at some point, so I did SOME stupid shit… (Like piling a lot of kids into my Explorer) but I was overall a pretty good girl.
One weekend, though. Columbus Day Weekend. My senior year of high school. My brother and I were left to our own devices. Sort of. Because there was Felix. Grandpa. G. However you sliced it, our 85 year old grandfather still lived with us. But my brother and I had big plans that weekend. My best friend (who was also my brother’s pal) was going to sleep over. And we were going to go dancing at Zero Gravity (the juice bar that we weren’t allowed to go to-because there were drugs there…even though I had already been there a few times over the previous year. Sleepovers were great.)
Elizabeth’s mom had a pretty high regard for me among most of her friends, so it was easy to say she was coming to my house. Neither of our parents knew that there would be dancing at the club. (Or should I say in da club? What do the cool kids say these days?) Our other friend Rae came over to join us, though she wasn’t planning on sleeping over.
We got ready by dressing in tiny spandex skorts and skimpy sparkle shirts, said goodbye to G and the four of us hopped into Melba Toast (the Explorer). We made our way to Zero Gravity (which seemed SO FAR AWAY-and really I live like 10 minutes from it now).
We danced our little hearts out. Warded off dirty older (like 19-year-old old) guys by dancing with each other. My brother was falling asleep on the bench, so he took the keys and went to sleep in the car. When the club closed, we made our way out (around one I think), and headed home.
I’ve drawn a little “art” to demonstrate how we got home.
The stupid dog was going to ruin EVERYTHING.
Yes, I would leave him to believe I was just in the laundry room…for God only knows why. Real bright, Chris.
He mumbled a lot of shit under his breath about not believing a word I said, but he went back to bed anyways. After I was assured that he was back in his room, I “let the dog out” in order to let my brother and Elizabeth in. We went to bed and all was (sort of) well.
G mentioned it again when my parents came home, but I just kept brushing it off. Hopefully, he knew I still loved him even though I lied through my teeth…and let’s be honest. I’m a TERRIBLE fucking liar.
9 Responses
This post reminds me of the time I snuck out my bedroom window. My friends and I were being silly, so I walked into the living room and told my parents where we were going (the truth) then climbed out my window and left. My momma raised me right, too. Which means she raised me to be terrified of getting into trouble. 😉
LOL. I was terrified of getting into trouble!
Bwahahahahaha! I’ve heard this story before, but it’s better with cartoons. Oh Felix. He was a good dude.
I always have fun making cartoons. 🙂
HOLY CRAP!!! I’m not sure which is better the story or the diagrams… I’m seriously wiping the tears away!!
LOL. Thanks, lady! Glad you enjoyed my very artistic drawings.
I never snuck out…..well in 8th grade sleeping in tents. We would walk the streets terrified a cop would see us. The next day,we would boast of our accomplishment. I really wasn’t a dork. It just sounds like it.
The diagrams are pure genius. Genius. i never sneaked out or in.
I love the cartoons too. So funny! I actually want to eat bacon after seeing your breakfast meal. Poor G. He didn’t know he was up against the master!